The Liberating Power of Letting Go: Balancing Discipline and Self-Care

This episode explores the vital lesson of letting go as a tool for personal growth and self-care, particularly during chaotic periods in life. It discusses the importance of recognizing limits, reframing the concept of breaks, utilizing backup plans, and communicating needs, ultimately advocating for a kinder approach to discipline that fosters creativity and resilience.

• Discusses the importance of letting go during chaotic times 
• Shares personal experience with stress and burnout 
• Explains reframing breaks as strategic rests 
• Highlights the need to acknowledge personal limits 
• Emphasizes the value of having backup plans 
• Encourages open communication about self-care needs 
• Concludes with the message of merging discipline and self-kindness

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Oh we could, we could fly. Welcome to this new season of the have a Cup of Chahani podcast. So I want to title this new season that I'm embarking on with I'm growing, so this is going to be the season of growth and that's what I'm going to share with you throughout the season. So I thank you for coming over here and sitting with me and I hope you enjoy coming over here and sitting with me and I hope you enjoy Hola pasitos, and welcome to this special episode of have a Cup of Johnny podcast. I know, I know it's not Wednesday, but sometimes, you know, life throws us curveballs and we have to adapt. So this week I am releasing a special episode because the second Wednesday of January just didn't happen, and today I want to talk about letting go when life gets chaotic and how even that ties into the habits we build. Are you ready? I don't know if you would say yes, because I mean, why else are you listening to this? All right, let's sip on this together.

Speaker 1: 1:23

So here's what happened. I was in the thick of it. Thick of it. I'm trying to find a rental home, and if you've ever been in that situation, you know it's not just physically draining, it's emotionally taxing too. Between the viewings going back and forth and the non-answered emails and voicemails. It was just constant decision-making, pivoting kind of thing, and I was depleted. It left me depleted. So while I had the podcast episode planned out, I just couldn't muster the energy to get it done. And normally I push through because I'm all about making movement, because eventually the motivation will happen.

Speaker 1: 2:19

But this time I realized something important. Time I realized something important, and that was that I needed to let it go for the sake of my well-being. And let me tell you that that wasn't easy. As someone who prides herself in consistency, missing a Wednesday felt like I was failing. But here's the thing Sometimes self-care looks like breaking your own rules, which brings me to the idea of letting go as a habit. And I know, I know, like even saying it out loud, it sounds counterintuitive, after all, like our habits about doing things right. But sometimes, as I learned from this, the most powerful habit is to know when to stop, pause or even skip a beat. Think about it no-transcript burnout, resentment and sometimes even the collapse of the very routines we work so hard to build. So letting go is a way of saying I value my health, I value my sanity over perfection. Perfection, it's a habit of self-kindness.

Speaker 1: 3:59

Now you might be thinking, joanne, isn't this the very opposite of what you just said on the last episode and the one before that about discipline over motivation? Superficially, yes, but not really, because discipline is about showing up, that's a given. But discipline it's also about knowing your limits and I've said this before you, gotta know your limits, because it's about making choices that align with your long-term goals and not just clicking boxes for the sake of clicking or ticking boxes. So, for example, I mean, let's go back to the second Wednesday of January, when I let go of that episode. I wasn't abandoning my podcast habit, not at all. I was preserving it by giving myself the grace to rest and ensure that I wouldn't resent the process or deliver something half-hearted. I took a pulse on it. That's discipline, because discipline is not rigid, it's adaptable, like our backup habits. So how do we cultivate the habit of letting go without feeling guilty?

Speaker 1: 5:23

Because I feel like I just came across this as a coincidence from what I experienced. What happened the second Wednesday of January? What happened the second Wednesday of January? But as I gather my thoughts and I wrote down some things I was able to gauge, to identify certain things that may help us and may help more. Do this not just through a coincidence because of what I went through, but actually actively doing it. And one of those things was acknowledge your limits, like recognize it when you're running on empty, recognize it right away. And, like I said, this was very coincidental for me. This was not something that I planned and this was not something that I had even written down in my journals, you know, like my backup habits. None of that.

Speaker 1: 6:22

I reacted to something that happened, ticking inside of me that was letting me know that I was running on empty, that I was getting to the point where it's like I was exhausted. You know I needed to take a knee and some of my things that manifest, I should say for me it's like not having restful sleep, waking up at one in the morning as opposed to my usual four or five, and those little kind of like manifestos that occurred gave me a hint that something was off and I listened to it. It pushed me to then reframe a missing habit, because there was this voice, you know, that just kind of like go against that, go against the logic of you need to rest, joannie, you know you need to take a break. It's okay to let this one go this Wednesday, because there's this nagging voice and I think you have to be very steady to hear it and if you do, let me know in the comments but it's this voice that just says the opposite of what is good for me and it's kind of like it just eggs me on to the complete opposite. You know, like guilt trips me over it saying how, like the listeners would have left, how I let them down, how I let myself down, you know, and it's just like this bullying kind of voice that is there, bullying kind of voice that is there and I had to talk to it to reframe that this is not a failure but a strategic rest, that I'm recharging and that I'll get back into it, which I'm proving my logical voice right by being behind the mic today.

Speaker 1: 8:33

And then the next thing that I did coincidentally not really knowing was having a backup plan. Like I knew in the back of my mind that I would do an extra episode that would be out of sequence and that would be kind of like my way to get back into that lane. You know, like I diverted from the path, I took a rest. I took a rest stop and now I'm adding something new to my road trip because of this additional rest stop, which was good for me. I needed it so I could continue going, but it was not planned, you know. So that's how I looked at this backup plan, because I was like you know what I'm?

Speaker 1: 9:17

I looked at this backup plan because I was like you know what, I'm gonna release an additional episode, and I was vacillating with the, the idea of talking about something that I experienced on social media. But then I was like Joelle, you have this perfect thing that you just learned, something that you just learned when you took a pause from doing the second Wednesday episode. I was like that's it, that's your additional episode, that's what you can talk about. So, once again, all of this I hate to repeat myself, but all of this was very coincidental. As I'm talking with you, I'm kind of like making it into a learning process so that way I can actively do this next time, not just bump into it through coincidence.

Speaker 1: 10:07

And then the next thing that I did was I communicated that with myself. I even told my husband hey, I'm going to go to the office that I even put together to do these podcast episodes and all of that. And I even told him I was like I didn't do the last Wednesday podcast episode. I think he could tell that I was a little disappointed and I was a little disappointed in myself. But once I continued to talk through it and understand it as a strategic rest, which I wanted, I let go of that disappointment and I was able to see it for what it is, which is a much needed pause.

Speaker 1: 10:52

And then the last thing is with everything that I've discussed in the podcast is just to reflect on it, and that is kind of like what I'm doing here with you is reflecting on this moment. So that way it doesn't have to be a coincidence, but it could be a strategic thing that I do next time, so that way I can move forward with sure footing per se. Move forward with sure footing per se. But that's what I would encourage all of y'all to do is to reflect. Take a moment to think about why you needed to let go of that habit during that time, what you gain from that pause and how you're going to bounce back and get right back into that lane. So I'll repeat these for you, since I wrote them down. What I coincidentally did for understanding that letting go was a good thing to do, and that was acknowledge that I had limitations, that I was running on empty, reframe the missing habit and not look at it as a failure, but a strategic rest. Have a backup plan when things don't go as expected. What am I going to do? Communicate with yourself and others and, lastly, reflect and move forward. And here's the big takeaway, bacitos Letting go is not about giving up.

Speaker 1: 12:26

It is not. It's about giving yourself space to breathe. And that space is so important for consistency in the long run, so important Because, think about it, the habits that stick are the ones we build with care, not pressure, because if we do it through pressure, we will be resentful of them and we will start equating them as something that doesn't bring us joy. So why even do it? But when we're kind to ourselves, we create room for growth, recovery and even creativity. This is a reminder that discipline and self-kindness go hand in hand. Let go of that drill sergeant image when it comes to discipline. Let go of it. Discipline is being kind to yourself by showing up for yourself. Think about it that way.

Speaker 1: 13:29

So, vacitos, if you've been feeling overwhelmed, or like you've dropped the ball on something, or like you've dropped the ball on something. Here's your reminder. It is absolutely okay. Letting go for a moment doesn't mean you've failed. It just means you're human. Thanks for hanging out with me for this special episode. I hope it inspires you to be a little kinder to yourself the next time life gets chaotic. If this message resonated with you, share with somebody who wants the reminder and, as always, keep growing and keep showing up in the ways that matter most. See you next time. Bye. Thank you so much for listening. I want to hear from you. Leave me a comment, do a rating if you can on the podcast, share it with somebody you love, but, most importantly, come back. See you next time. Bye.